I have written before but it was not published.
My name is Rose, I am 30 yrs old. I got married to a man I dated for only 3 months this January. The bride price was paid by Jan and we are planning for our traditional and church wedding by Dec and we have been living together since then because of my job.
The problem now is that I have found out that "WE DON,T HAVE SO MUCH IN COMMON". W"E ARGUE ALMOST EVERYDAY BECAUSE HE ALWAYS HAS THIS FEELING THAT I WANT TO SHOW HIM THAT I AM A GRADUATE. HE REJECTS ANY SUGGESTION I BRING AND TELLS ME THAT HE MAY NOT HAVE GONE TO SCHOOL BUT HE KNOWS HE IS BETTER THAN ME. I TRY ALL I CAN TO LET HIM KNOW THAT IT DOSEN,T MATTER IF I AM MORE EDUCATED THAN HIM BUT HE ALREADY HAS THIS BELIEVE THAT EDUCATED WOMEN ARE FULL OF THEMSELVES AND WILL ALWAYS WANT TO CONTROL THEIR HUSBAND SO HE HAS DECIDED TO TURN DOWN ANY SUGGESTION I BRING SO THAT HE WILL BE IN CONTROL."
Secondly, he dosen't give me money for anything I want to do personally. Since that Jan, he has never given me money for cloth, shoes, even to make my hair. He keeps promising that he knows how to take care of women that when the time comes, he will spoil me with money. He gets money and buys enough food and anything we use together but dosen,t bother about my personal needs though he is still good in a way.
"HE TELLS ME ABOUT A GIRL HE DATED FOR ALMOST 6YEARS BUT THE GIRL REFUSED TO MARRY HIM BECAUSE HE FORCED HER TO DO ABORTION. THE GIRL STILL CALLS HIM EVEN DEMANDING FOR HIS FINANCIAL ASSISTANCE THOUGH HE TURNED IT DOWN BUT HE REFUSED TO TELL HER HE IS MARRIED. TELLS ME HE WANTS TO TELL HER AFTER OUR WEDDING BECAUSE HE DOESN,T WANT PROBLEM."
I have a strong feeling that I he may even become worst after the wedding but the issue now is that I don,t know what to do because I feel that if I stop the marriage, I may find it difficult to get married again because I have some health issues that has to do with reproduction. My people will be disappointed in me because my sisters are happily married with kids and there has never been a case of break up in our entire family. Also my sister warned me against the marriage a day before the bride price was paid by telling that she noticed that I am not in love with the man but only wanted to get married but I told her it was too late.
"THE ISSUE IS THAT I AM NOT HAPPY, NOT EVEN EXCITED ABOUT THE WEDDING PLAN." I feel I am walking into a pit but don,t know how to stop myself. Please I need to hear what you have to say on this issue because I am confused.This article is (c) Copyright - All rights reserved www.wivestownhallconnection.com
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