Things To Remember When Looking For Love

For many people, love is the most important part of being alive. When we're alone, we feel it's the one piece of the puzzle that's missing, and if only we could find that special someone, we feel we'd be happier and more able to live the lives we want. But we also know that love doesn't come easy. When we go a long time without feeling love (or feeling loved), or feeling it for the wrong sort of person, it's easy to get disheartened and judge ourselves.

The truth is the chemistry behind what creates a relationship and what makes it last is exceedingly complex. We don't find love-love finds us. You should never blame yourself for being alone, but you should always strive to put yourself in a place where love can find you more easily.

* LEARN TO KNOW AND LOVE YOURSELF. It's a cliche, but some cliches are true and this is one of them. If you harbor resentments towards who you are, these insecurities could keep you in your head when a relationship does come along and prevent your love from blossoming fully. When good love goes bad, it's often because the ego gets involved, and being single is the perfect time to put your ego in a healthy place so you're prepared for love.

* STOP THINKING OF LOVE IN THE ABSTRACT. When you crave for love in general, you crave for the ego-boosts that come along with it. The status of being in a couple, what your partner says about who you are, the Hollywood notions of what a relationship looks like. These are all fine when it comes to icing on the cake, but don't confuse them for the cake. The cake is when two people meet and there seems to be a specific and unprecedented channel between their brains and hearts. No one can tell you what this channel looks like for sure-there are as many kinds of love as there are hearts.

* AT THE SAME TIME, BE CLEAR AND HONEST WITH YOURSELF AND WITH OTHERS ABOUT WHAT SORT OF RELATIONSHIP YOU FEEL PREPARED FOR. Who can say what will happen when you meet that person who sweeps you off your feet, but the more you know going in about where you are in life and what you're ready for, the truer the connection will be. Are you looking for long-term or short-term? Marriage and children or casual dating?

* FOLLOW YOUR IMPULSES. Once you've achieved #1 and can be sure that your impulses are healthy and constructive, follow them! Put yourself in new places as often as possible where love can see you. Say yes to wacky and unexpected opportunities and learn to love these adventures irrespective of match-seeking.

* LASTLY, DON'T FORGET ABOUT OTHER FORMS OF LOVE. Selfless, loving interactions with others are what makes life worth living. Showing affection and appreciation for family and friends doesn't just feel good, it is the easiest way to get out of your own way and be the best version of yourself, the version of yourself that love can't help but find!

Credit: break-seduction.blogspot.com